Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Martina and the terrible, horrible, very bad day

Everybody has those horrible Murphy's Law days. Today was just such a day for me. First, PayPal didn't come through. It'll probably be here tomorrow but what good would that have done me? My doctor's appointment and the last writing group before Naugatuck River Review submissions was tonight. In desperation I called someone I loaned money to a while ago. They, of course, were nowhere to be found. Then I called my friend from The Florence Poets’ Society. She came and bought me $10. She gave me $20 even though I asked for $10.

I really needed $20 so I could eat, but like a lot of people with disabilities and without I have trouble sometimes accepting help just for myself. Marianne is a good friend and knows I have this tendency. So she gave me $20.

After that, the agency that pays my assistants called me to say that something was wrong with someone's timesheet. As I waited on hold for an hour and a half and I have phone records to prove this. We finally got it all figured out. This was after I had talked to them 5 times and my assistant talked to them twice, because they didn't understand me. I'm sorry, but don't they work with people with speech impairments daily? They are an independent living center after all.

In the end, I am so grateful that I had elected to take Marianne's extra money when offered. It meant I got to eat lunch between my writing group and my doctor's appointment. I could have done without eating but it's really bad for me to do so because my sugar levels get out of whack and then I tend to fall down. Such is life when you have cerebral palsy, wonky blood sugar levels, and occasionally no money.

After having my ears cleaned, I went to a local pizzeria near where my writing group meets. I ordered a burger and onion rings and headed to the library. Unbeknownst to me, someone had waxed the floor. My PA (personal assistant) was having trouble not slipping on it. Let alone me with my poor balance issues. All I could think about was falling on my knee again, spending another six weeks in bed and missing the next ADAPT action. After three attempts, I was finally seated well enough to do my business.

But alas, my troubles didn't end there. Somehow, and I'm not even sure how, my backpack got stuck on the toilet and my entire purse fell out of my backpack and into the water, which, thankfully, had been flushed. All my cards, my phone, my wallet, and my bag were now soaked. Could this day get any worse?

It did. When I got home I called my mom because my phone was still not working right. Instead of being sympathetic towards my really sucky day she got mad at me for being irresponsible. I thought that in order to be irresponsible you had to know something was going to happen and not prepare for it. For example, it would've been very irresponsible of me to not charge my backup chair knowing that we were going to have a hurricane but my backpack had never gotten caught on a toilet before. How was I to know that was even possible?

Now, unless my phone starts working, I have to pay a $50 deductible. My mother says it will teach me to be more responsible. I may be a bit behind other thirtysomethings but I am not 11. I would fully accept my part if this had happened before, but it never did. I really can't afford to give her $50 and I'm not going to. I will find a phone on freecycle and I will tell my activist friends that if they are looking to give away their phones to upgrade I’ll take them. Where there's a will there's a way and $50 just ain't the way this week.

Friday, August 26, 2011

Transformers: Dark Side of the Moon

I treated my personal care assistant and myself to this movie. As much as I am a big pacifist in life I have a weakness for action, shoot-'em-up , Hollywood style mega movies. It's my dirty little secret. We saw the 3-D version because otherwise what's the point of going to the big theater?

I forked over the rather ridiculous ticket price of $8.75 each and we went in. The first thing I noticed was that Sam Witwicky's (played by Shia LaBeouf) taste in women had gone down considerably. No longer was he attached to the irrepressible, and actually interesting, Mikaela Banes (played by Megan Fox). When she had ditched him, apparently Sam had decided that independent women just weren't his thing, because the next girl he dated, Carly Spencer (Rosie Huntington-Whiteley), reminded me more of Malibu Barbie than Lois Lane.

I know the story is fictional, but I ask you, how is that whiny, superficial woman ever going to be the permanent love interest of someone who periodically gets called to go save the world with his robot friends?

The first time he did, she nearly had a heart attack. Boy, did she ever throw a tantrum! She even took back the bunny she'd won for Sam. Sorry, girl, but your man isn't going to be home for dinner every night. He's too busy saving the world. Suck it up and deal!

While we're still on thesubject of Carly, am I the only person who finds it disturbing that Sam's new love interest looks a lot like the Desepticon who impersonated a cute girl in order to get Sam to reveal secrets. I'm sorry, but if I were a superhero the last thing I would want to do is sleep next to a woman who resembled the robot who had tried to sexually assault me!

As you can tell, I was one pissed off feminist during the movie. I realize that Michael Bay and Megan Fox might have had significant creative differences, but that doesn't excuse the replacing a strong woman with a Barbie doll. If they had to find Sam a new girlfriend couldn't she at least have been a little less codependent?

Aside from the Carly issue, this movie didn't make a lot of sense. I had trouble following the plot. Although I did enjoy the action scenes, especially the 3-D parts. But then again perhaps it's my fault for expecting good writing in action movies, which never seems to happen.

The Internet Movie Database rates the film a six. I find even that a bit high. I would go more towards 5.5. If you want plot, this is not your movie. Even with that caveat, I know I'll probably go back and see the next installment of Transformers. Once a fan, always a fan, whatever Hollywood might do to a beloved franchise!